I started saying “yes chef” long before I watched The Bear

If you don’t like it, then you don’t like me, and I don’t care

I’m not always sure what’s me and what’s not

Having a job doesn’t help, taking things seriously gives me brain rot

The Coldplay CEO affair made my week, but ruined more than two people’s lives

It’s a joke, and the punchline is mid-looking men always try to have two wives

I hate technology, but at least it gave us memes

Like the Fireflies song says, my dreams are bursting at the seams

My forty year old cousin’s tumblr handle is @comfortablecousin

It makes me uncomfy, why couldn’t it have been @iammclovin

You can’t choose your cousins, but some are my friends

I roadtripped with one last week, our brains share odds and ends

Halfway down the interstate she said, “You were depressed as a teenager too?”

“Damn, we really could’ve queened out in our misery together, if only I knew.”

Last month I watched an oscar winning film about a female stripper

I still think about the ending scene that made me sob, I saw myself in her.

My mom points out what I’d like to ignore

And follows it with “Just sayin”, softly closing the door.

Life is just an episode of Seinfeld if you close your eyes long enough

The one when they get lost in a parking garage, tough stuff

I see something in George Costanza, Charlie Day, and Walter White

I wouldn’t sleep with any of them, maybe that’s why that feels right 

Sometimes I feel like a little bitch

So I run as fast as I can to Doechii, and then feel like that little bitch

Let’s laugh so we don’t cry, but it’s all the same when you’re deaf

If you ask me if tomorrow will be better, I just might say, “yes, chef.”


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